The cultural practice of Lomilomi is complex and can be complicated for those who are not native Hawaiian. As one who is clearly not native Hawaiian,but who practices and facilitates this work, I walk a fine line of authenticity and the synthesis,meaning that,I bring a certain characteristic and spirit to this work that is not Hawaiian,but that the soul root and essence of this work IS Hawaiian. It is not my intention to claim anything or take ownership of a spirituality and a religious practice that is not inherently in my own heritage,and I am certainly not here to offend anyone,its up to the individual to make the choice to be offended by what I do or to get to know who it is that I am so that communication and dialogue can be established so that the intent is clear(thats for all the Natives out there who may raise an eyebrow to me). I feel like there is an evolution of this work and also a spectrum and lens with which to view it. Abraham Kawaii,who created Temple Style Lomilomi, evolved this work to fit the Western mindset that might not be totally embodied in spirit and how that spirit connects to body,and land and mind and the whole enchilada of experience in ALL things tangible and mystery. The spirit of lomilomi has its roots with the Kupuna(elders,ancestors) and how they touched life and also how they "prayed" for the healing to occur. On a physical level the work does what any other bodywork does,in my view there is not a separation of how lomilomi affects the physical body and how Rolfing affects the body and the mind that powers it. There IS a mystery at work here and that will always remain as such. My own personal Kupuna(ancestors) comes through the work and its not Hawaiian but I honor the Hawaiians by learning Oli(chant) and Pule(prayer) and saying it,as best I can to honor that aspect of the work as I work in the lomilomi way, and the rest is me,and the rest is the mystery. That's all for now. I will share more as it compels me when it comes to me. Thank you,JB.
Writings for 2024(coming soon!) I decided to erase the writings for 2020 and up to this point as they are outdated and irrelevant to today. Time to move forward. I will have more writing soon! I am also in the process of writing a book about the Ceremonial and Ritual aspects of Bodywork(focusing on the Shamanic process and how that can help people who are in therapy for trauma and PTSD etc).
MAY 8th 2024
(Balance and Practicality in all things energetic and "Shamanic"). There has been a recurring mantra that has been told to me by people,both indigenous and non, who were on that good healers path that I have met over the years. This mantra is actually a couple of important questions and they are, "What is the practical application of what you are facilitating for the world?" The second question is, "If you cannot practically apply this healing work that travels in the realm of spirit and energy then what real use is it?" I have asked myself these questions for years and the answers to these questions have molded and shaped the work that I do. I would pose these questions to anyone practicing Shamanic work and healing work that is more alternative to say the traditional western healing traditions rooted in Science and applied theory. Those realms are very important and they can help explain or "justify" the energetic/shamanic work by helping to cross the left and right brain bridge of experience and creativity and analytical thought. We can galvanize this idea of the realm of spirit and energy and how that resonates in our body and mind with how our mind also interprets and analyzes and tests theories to their solid or forgone conclusions. Theories change when we question/test them properly and have our support system of other minds to help. It can be the same with energy work and Shamanic work ,but in the practical sense we are working with the mind and its perceptions. For me the practical application is in how it helps people to feel connected to and aligned with the environment around them and how they feel connected into themselves.
In my humble opinion, if you are so bound to tradition and dogma and your mind only stays within the realm of magical thinking,you will run into an impasse with the world because you,in fact,live in a very tangible and physical world and yet there are unseen things out there. Scientifically we have been able to discover ie: the atom,molecules,tiny microscopic organisms etc etc. But the "unseen" and "mystery" of say how you perceive God or Spirit or "energy work" in the body and spirits and angels and things of that nature rest solely in the mind and its "perception through feeling" those things. Tradition can be a beautiful thing,it gives us identity and a sense of where we came from and who we are and where we might be going. Tradition can also be a prison and a mind manipulation that will tell you that one thing is true,yet by all accounts and reality it is clearly not,yet we start to believe it as reality,that can have a damaging effect if those traditions are utilized to manipulate a vulnerable mind,a depressed mind,a confused and troubled mind. Which brings me back to the initial question of "What is the practical application of what you are facilitating for the world?" I would pose this question as well,"Is what you are doing truly helping people or is it just helping yourself,is there an agenda at work here that only seeks to get that from people which you feel you need or want from them ie: money and things material? Sure we all need to make a living in this modern society,but at what real cost to your conscience and your heart?" "Is what I am doing helping my family in a good way? is what I am doing helping the world in a good way? Is it good for my community? If it truly is so then so shall it be.
May 10th 2024 (Balance and Practicality in all things energetic & Shamanic CONT.)
So let's get into the specifics of the Practicality of what I do with Hawaiian Temple bodywork. For years I have been aware of the mind,body,heart connection,however, I was not an actual witness to how all these aspects of our being work in synergy with one another until I started learning massage. My first witnessing of this phenomena was when I was first in massage school back in 1994. We were practicing some hands on applied work on one another and we decided to get into groups of three and do tandem work(two people working on one person) with some real basic techniques). Me and another individual were doing some deeper work parallel to the 3rd person's spine. After a few minutes of working the individual started to cry uncontrollably and regressed into a kind of child like state,but in a very intense and erratic way,by that I mean they were crying and shaking on the table and then proceeding to shift their body into a fetal position and just kept on sobbing. Needless to say that myself and the other student in the class were freaked out and confused."What had we done? Had we injured this person? The instructor came over and helped this person off the table and escorted them outside and at that time class was over. The next day the instructor informed us that this student dropped the program and would not be coming back. They proceeded to explain to me and the other student that I was partnered with what had happened. What was explained to us was an emotional release and trigger,of sorts, when we were working on them and they had repressed memories flood back into their mind of when they were sexually abused by a family member and that they could not deal with that sudden trigger and flood of repressed memories. This literally blew my mind and also opened my eyes to the power of touch and what it is capable of facilitating with people. It would not be until almost 14yrs later that I would again experience this type of emotional release myself,but not in the same context,but with Hawaiian Temple Bodywork and how sometimes these cathartic processes are facilitated within a person's psyche and body. Trust me that this is NOT an intentional process,it just sometimes happens and I felt as though,then and now that I had to be very aware of this process within people and be able to know how to mindfully deal with it and also how I could affect a positive outcome with clients,rather than they be left to deal with these emotional triggers and releases that could be more intense than they were expecting. The practicality of the Shamanic work that I do dips its feet into the realm of Somatic Experiencing and mindful body centered psychotherapy and working with those therapists, as an adjunct support system , who treat those individuals who are seeking out therapy for traumas such as PTSD from abuse both sexually,physically etc. The mindful blending of these two realms with a base knowledge of psychological processes from the Western and sometimes eastern mindset, coupled with that of the Ceremony and Ritual found in shamanism,can be a powerful tool,when used mindfully, to help a person become as aligned with their mind and body and spirit(however they identify that) as they can be for robust mental health and positive well being.
AUGUST 2024: The trash talk and Ho'okamaniha(disrespect) of Kahu Abraham Kawaii and those who put it forth PART 1.
I recently facilitated a session for someone who studied lomilomi from another Kumu from a different lineage. Now I know of this other teacher and style but I do not know them personally nor do I have an opinion on what they teach and facilitate. There is a lot of Lomilomi out there and people have their way of expressing it and putting it forth. What concerns me is the gossip and politics and trash talk of other teachers of different lineages of Lomilomi and how those teachers and their students,who are influenced by them,put themselves forth in not only their demeanor and attitude,but their rhetoric as well. I went into this session with an open heart and with a desire to put forth the work and help people,that is it, everything else is irrelevant. When I was finished with the session and served them water and tea and asked them about their session,without going into a lot of detail,I could feel the judgement and the ego and the disrespect just flowing out of them as they spoke to me. It's as if the only reason why they wanted to receive a session from me was to "Check me out" and already had an "expectation" of the session before they even entered my space. They were trying to be nice and choosing their words carefully but I could sense and hear what was beneath the superficial pleasantries. Lots of criticisms,very passive ones and just overall a demeanor of Ho'okamaniha(disrespect).
What I was listening to was not really them,in my opinion. What I was hearing was this other teacher and their students putting down and scoffing at the lineage of another teacher and their students and practitioners. It made me sad and also quite uncomfortable. When it was all said and done,I came home and showered off the energy and just lamented at this. Now,I must state that I already knew that this other teacher and some of their students have put down and scoffed at the Hawaiian Temple Bodywork lineage,and I have done my best to stay away from and disregard that kind of bullshit in this realm as I want no part in it. It goes against EVERYTHING that I was ever taught by good people both native/indigenous and non-native about respecting others and not buying into the pettiness and gossip. Alas I am still human and not impervious to this. I do the Best that I can to do my part in this Ohana Nui(Great Family and Community). It is my firm belief that when you partake of and listen to others and their Ho'okamaniha of others you are allowing them to plant a seed that will grow rather quickly into a wall of briars around your heart and your attitude. If you encounter Teachers and students of their teachers that partake of this,turn the other way and leave. If the only way that they can build up what they teach and facilitate is to put down others,then they might not be really teaching you anything of substance or value,regardless of how good the work is,it gets tainted and soiled and you have to spend your time trying to navigate your way through the work and what is being taught to you. What's more so is that you begin to take on their attitude and put it forth as if it is gospel. I have NEVER done this in ANY of my workshops and actually encourage students of mine to go out there and explore other lineages,for as we say,"Not all wisdom is taught in one school". Aloha Noa Kakou!! Part 2 coming soon.
Part 2 August 2024: I have had time to reflect on the last post about "The trash talk and Ho'okamaniha(disrespect) of Kahu Abraham Kawaii and Hawaiian Temple Bodywork. When you take on the responsibility of following a path like this,amidst the criticisms that you will receive and the rhetoric that you will hear from others who feel as though they "Have the true authentic way" of following or doing things,you start to question your own validity and your own self worth. The caustic nature of people who are unaware of how they are being or who are very aware of their attitude,but just do not care how it affects others,can tax and drain your physical ,mental and heart energy. This is why compassionate disengagement(as explained and taught by Harry Uhane Jim) can really save you from falling into that rabbit hole of self doubt and attaching yourself to the individuals that you try to help and facilitate for. The concept of "compassionate disengagement" is talked about and a brief definition of what that is is given in Harry's book "Wise Secrets of Aloha" but there is not a HOW to compassionately disengage process. I will attempt to share how I did this with the last session I facilitated where the outcome was not so positive. For positive outcomes of sessions it is easy to disenegage compassionately because there is nothing left to ponder or to attach yourself to. It is done,it is completed. Now their experience grows from within them and you have nothing more to do with it. With outcomes that are negative where they criticise you for whatever reasons(like mentioned in the post above) You have to realize your own human nature to feel the experience of how that impacted you and affected you,just as how one feels after one is say,attacked physically. You go through that experience,you come out of it still alive but traumatized and you begin a healing process and a processing of your brain and how that experience is affecting you. Since I was not attacked physically but more emotionally and mentally,it was essential that I allow myself to go through all the emotions of that experience and not repress them. So I went through the disbelief that it actually happened,the emotions surrounding that experience,the anger,the sadness, the dark thoughts,the internal dialogue of defending myself to myself,and also how that manifests physically within my body. This is where ritual and ceremony of a personal nature comes in to help re-align and make pono my being both mentally and physically. The spiritual aspect has always been solid with me, so for me,that is a non factor but it can also play a role afterwards. So the main ritual I performed was a simple one and actually was quite comical,in my opinion. I took the cash that this individual gave me for the session,and I spent it all quickly to get rid of it. I bought dinner for me and my partner,ordered a couple of things off Amazon and rid myself of that money exchange. It may seem silly but the feeling of finally letting go of that material exchange with this individual helped me to let go of the attachment of how that individual treated me and the session. That is how I compassionately disengaged from them and that session. The rest was just going through those emotions and then out of them. I am not saying that this is what anyone else needs to do in similar situations,for me this is what worked and if it can work for others,then great.
SEPTEMBER 2024: (People,energies all erratic,and learning lessons about boundaries):
Sometimes I have to remember that not everyone is receptive to who a person is and what they are about. Especially when it comes to myself. I have been told that I am a "Safe Male" to be around and I have honored that opinion and assessment of me as I know this to be true because I know where my heart is and I know who I am. I sometimes get too involved with myself and automatically think that everyone is going to pick up on this,like how when animals can sense if a human is "safe" or "shady" and it has a lot to do with how their energy and affect is. People sometimes are not as receptive and not because they are inept or ignorant,it is because many of us are on guard all the time because we never know who may be in our midst trying to do us harm or have an agenda. Even I have a tough time with my own discernment and can be skeptical of people. The times that we are living in and what certain individuals and groups of people have created have made us on edge,and also our past traumas,when they are not effectively dealt with can also rule our existence and shadow us from the "Good People" that are out there. My lesson about boundaries was learned the other day when I was coming out of the local grocery store where I was currently living,with some soup in hand and I decided to put some money in the local musician's hat playing a marimba and tamborine. I was actually there doing laundry and waiting for it to dry. As I went to go sit down at the table that was open,A woman had sat down but she was alone. I went up and asked her if I could sit in the other chair and she immediately looked up at me and was startled and said " No,I'll go" and quickly left. I did not think much of it at the time,as where I am from and in the city and social settings be it at a coffee shop or tea house or cafe' people are always sitting at tables and being amenable to others coming to sit down and enjoy their tea/coffee/soup,especially when it is crowded,it is just a southern thing(which can be a positive experience as you may meet a potential good friend). Needless to say afterwards I was feeling very bad and self conscious because I scared this person off and I did not mean to nor did I have any agenda to ask them out or engage in any conversation at all. I have thought on this for a while and have done my best to karmically clear myself of potential wrong doing but also to realize that I am in a different place and space and what was once just common place and relatively harmless where I was,is not always so everywhere. I also understand how Women can feel scrutinized and oogled by Men. SO,boundaries a must and sending a pule' and prayer out to the universe and to that person an apology and asking forgiveness. I have dedicated my life to helping people and do not wish harm to anyone.
September 18th 2024: The wisdom and courage to walk away from abusive situations and abusive people. It can be challenging for people to walk away from situations that they know to be abusive,or when you start to see the signs of abusive behavior and you do your best to process through that behavior and need to make hard decisions. Often times people are so wrapped up in their own expectations of how relationships are going to be that they do not take a conscious step back to actually see the leaves for the trees,so to speak. Our hearts can blind us to reality at times and then at the same time can reveal to us beautiful truths. Being in "right relationship" to one's self is monumentally important. It precedes everything else. I come from a background of abuse and neglect and other things that happened to me that I do not wish to share on this platform. I have gone through a good deal of therapy to help deal with this past and to be able to move forward with a kind heart but also a heart of discernment. One thing,though,that most do not realize is that someone who has been horribly abused will acquire 2 extra traits that can either help or inhibit an individual of being in right relationship to themselves and others,especially others. The 1st trait is being very sensitive and being overly triggered at the actions and behaviors of others towards them. Sometimes this trait blinds us to the intent of those actions and behaviors and we put up walls between us and others. Sometimes those walls are unnecessary and keep us separate from being "Pono"(right relationship) to others and to ourselves. We then push away or self sabotage love that is being put forth to us. The other trait is that extra empathic sensory perception that notices and see's and detects abusive people and their actions and behaviors from a mile away. Because of our past experiences it gives us that uncanny ability to spot it and recognize it and either avoid or stand up for one's self. It is a powerful trait that we seldom truly utilize because we fall into our heart space like jumping off a cliff into the water below. The feeling of falling feels like the feeling of flying and for a brief moment in time,it feels good,that is until we hit the ground or the water and injure ourselves or we survive it only to go back up that cliff and do it again,always taking chances. The 2 traits I mentioned intermix and becomes a confusing array of feelings and scenarios and confusions. We must learn how to separate these traits,fellow survivors. When you sense that an individual is not in right relationship with themselves and we attach to them,we attach and take on their dysfunctions. When we are not in right relationship to ourselves and we attach to another they take on our dysfunction. We do this all the time for the sake of love and feeling in our hearts and that feeling of wanting to be truly loved apart from ourselves,for we are not born to be a deserted island,emotionally,physically and spiritually. Have the courage to walk away when it truly warrants that and have the courage to stay but ONLY if both possess a true ability of conflict resolution skills. It does not work if one has that ability and the other does not,and quite often the person who is abusive and not in right relationship will always project their faults onto you and will blame you for not having those conflict resolution skills. AND Vice versa. Have the courage to walk away,like I did. Yes it happens to Men as well.